Managing relationships as a dad
Being a dad, you may find that a baby can change existing relationships. You may need to make sure that things are going well with others.
Make time for each other
If you live with the baby’s other parent, it can be easy to feel pushed aside when the baby arrives. It may feel like they have less time for you, especially during the first few weeks. You can create new ways to spend time together, such as being close and talking when the baby is feeding. It can be helpful to chat during pregnancy about how you will spend time together once the baby is born.
If you're not living with the other parent, or in a relationship but are co-parenting, make time to check in with each other. Talk about how things are going and about each other’s needs.
Friends and family
It helps to strike a balance between introducing your newborn to loved ones and ensuring the baby’s wellbeing and comfort.
Before the baby arrives, agree how you will manage visits by friends and family members. If you have very eager well-wishers, you may choose to stagger visits or offer specific visiting times to stop you feeling overwhelmed.
Make sure your visitors have clean hands before they touch or hold the baby will help keep your newborn healthy. Visitors often want to help, so why not give them tasks around the house. This gives you and the other parent more time to spend together and with your baby.
Becoming a dad is a very busy time, and you will probably see less of some of your friends and family for a while. Keeping in contact by having short phone calls and text conversations will help you feel grounded in everyday life.
Physical relationships
Having a baby often changes many aspects of your relationship, including intimacy. If you live with the baby’s mum, it’s natural for your sex life to change. This can be because of lack of sleep, limited time, changes to your partner's body or the type of birth your partner experienced. You might both have questions, like whether sex will feel different or if it might be uncomfortable.
It’s important to take things at a pace that feels right for both of you. Open and honest conversations about how you’re both feeling can help you understand each other’s expectations as you adjust to this new stage of life.
Avoid conflicts
Parenting comes with its challenges, and it’s normal to feel stressed or more prone to arguments at times. Not all conflict is harmful, many parents argue occasionally, but it’s important to recognise when disagreements may be affecting your family’s well-being.
Taking steps to manage stress can help reduce tension. For example, try taking short breaks during stressful moments, practising active listening during discussions, and focusing on solutions instead of assigning blame. If conflict becomes difficult to manage, it’s okay to seek support from a friend, family member, or professional.
For more advice, see our page on reducing arguments and conflict between parents.
Separated parents
Being a dad after separation can bring a mix of emotions, whether or not you wanted the relationship to end. You might face challenges, but you also have opportunities to build a strong and positive relationship with your child.
If you and your partner are no longer together, see our pages on single parents and support for separated parents.
Find local support groups and events
Our Kent Local Directory contains listings for local activities, events and groups. Some of these are aimed at fathers and may be able to help. See our Kent Local Directory listing for dads.